Worrying!

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Expand view Topic review: Worrying!

Re: Worrying!

Post by Abs » Thu Aug 23, 2018 9:56 am

art0hur0moh wrote:
Gabby wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
Abs wrote:
Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Hang in there, I can imagine how hard it must be to you.


I was thinking how much you enjoyed your poetry, do you still write any?

Also you were good at making games threads :smilin:


I haven't written in quite awhile cept the poems I wrote for my dad, and my son. Yeah I was still doing my games elsewhere but with all the stuff i've been through I just didn't feel like doing it anymore. Nothing interests me, nothing matters I just don't care. I just want to join my son.


Oh Abs, my heart breaks for you..... you must speak to others experiencing the same as you.... don’t face it alone, you’re not on your own, you could gain some comfort by doing so :wubbers:


I am not entirelly sure speaking with people who have the same experience is always beneficial. As they say missery loves company. I think it better to find someone you have a rapport with.

To me, especially after just reading that ABS and Kizzie have similar experience. I couldn't imagine, nor do I want to :( I got adrenaline rushes simply seeing them fall over.

Do the two of you talk with each other? Seems you would be able to talk with each without actually feeling compelled.

If you don't mind me asking. What age ranges?

My friend who was a very outgoing person before we left SA to here and they Australia. Committed suicide at 21. I think my godfather blamed himself, and godmother never really came to terms with it. I never brought up the topic and they never opened up about it. We did alot of things together, and they still have an older son and younger daughter. There was always something to do with them. I learned alot about life, personal care and responsibility.

Take care, ABS Kezzie[/quote]


I'm sorry I didn't see this before now art0hur0moh. I came to the conclusion that talking to someone who went through the same thing is not beneficial, at least not for me. If you and meant do me and Kizzie talk? I do not know her and this was the first time I think we been in a thread together. If you were referring to my age range I'm 61 and if you were referring to what age my son was when he left this world he was 29. I think most parents blame themselves, I know I do. And like your Godmother, I know I won't ever come to terms with it.

Re: Worrying!

Post by art0hur0moh » Fri Aug 17, 2018 4:24 am

Gabby wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Hang in there, I can imagine how hard it must be to you.


I was thinking how much you enjoyed your poetry, do you still write any?

Also you were good at making games threads :smilin:


I haven't written in quite awhile cept the poems I wrote for my dad, and my son. Yeah I was still doing my games elsewhere but with all the stuff i've been through I just didn't feel like doing it anymore. Nothing interests me, nothing matters I just don't care. I just want to join my son.


Oh Abs, my heart breaks for you..... you must speak to others experiencing the same as you.... don’t face it alone, you’re not on your own, you could gain some comfort by doing so :wubbers:


I am not entirelly sure speaking with people who have the same experience is always beneficial. As they say missery loves company. I think it better to find someone you have a rapport with.

To me, especially after just reading that ABS and Kizzie have similar experience. I couldn't imagine, nor do I want to :( I got adrenaline rushes simply seeing them fall over.

Do the two of you talk with each other? Seems you would be able to talk with each without actually feeling compelled.

If you don't mind me asking. What age ranges?

My friend who was a very outgoing person before we left SA to here and they Australia. Committed suicide at 21. I think my godfather blamed himself, and godmother never really came to terms with it. I never brought up the topic and they never opened up about it. We did alot of things together, and they still have an older son and younger daughter. There was always something to do with them. I learned alot about life, personal care and responsibility.

Take care, ABS Kezzie

Re: Worrying!

Post by calitom » Mon Aug 13, 2018 10:19 pm

Kizzie wrote:
Abs wrote:
Aww don't worry about me. I was talking to this one lady who thought I was suicidal, so she talked me into talking to some people who have gone through the same, she said it will help me and that person. It didn't go well. The first time she called all she did was sit and talk about her son and how I will lose all my friends like she did and how it will never stop hurting. How some days she can not get out of bed even though it's been 12 years. All she did was make me feel worse. It may have helped her to get to talk about it, but it didn't help me at all.


She sounds like my old support worker. spent the whole hour a week for 5 years talking about herself. Didn't do one thing to support me. I finally pucked up the courage to talk to my SW about her and she then deemed I was well enough to not need support anymore. Good job my sense of humour always stayed with me.

As with everything, One day at a time, one moment at a time. If I had done what I wanted to years back I would not be here now, the happiest or should I say, content-est time of my life, I would have missed so much.

:wubbers:


i know its a stretch..but perhaps some reverse psychology going on there?? and w the person who spoke with abs???

Re: Worrying!

Post by art0hur0moh » Sat Aug 11, 2018 12:16 pm

Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


I concluded a long time ago. Whatever happens, so long as they are living there life to the fullest. And doing things they enjoy. That gives me a bit of security and comfort. So manythings can and do go wrong. I try focus on what goes right.

Daily contact. Something I neglected a bit with my eldest (17 on the 1st), during my mourning and suicidal phase. I see him almost daily now, as well as message him on fb. I have been informed his mum is adamant that he is to vacate her home by my daughter 8 in october.

Focus on what goes right. The stress of worry can have unusual repercussions later. The world and people are not a dangerous as people think. Glasgow has a higher knife crime murder rate than London. Scotland as a ratio of murders is comparable to Turtle Island.

Re: Worrying!

Post by Abs » Mon Jun 04, 2018 5:00 am

Kizzie wrote:
Abs wrote:
Aww don't worry about me. I was talking to this one lady who thought I was suicidal, so she talked me into talking to some people who have gone through the same, she said it will help me and that person. It didn't go well. The first time she called all she did was sit and talk about her son and how I will lose all my friends like she did and how it will never stop hurting. How some days she can not get out of bed even though it's been 12 years. All she did was make me feel worse. It may have helped her to get to talk about it, but it didn't help me at all.


She sounds like my old support worker. spent the whole hour a week for 5 years talking about herself. Didn't do one thing to support me. I finally pucked up the courage to talk to my SW about her and she then deemed I was well enough to not need support anymore. Good job my sense of humour always stayed with me.

As with everything, One day at a time, one moment at a time. If I had done what I wanted to years back I would not be here now, the happiest or should I say, content-est time of my life, I would have missed so much.

:wubbers:


Well she sounds worse than this lady. She called one day to say that she had gotten an email from me, but accidently deleted it as she didn't recognize my email name. So I said I would send it again, I did, and she still never replied. So I wrote her off. I'm glad it worked out for you. :)

Re: Worrying!

Post by Kizzie » Sun Jun 03, 2018 7:21 am

Bella, he sounds a great lad. I also dyscalculia and dyslexia and it's not easy travelling outside your own country with those problems. but like everything we muddle on and get there in the end. Its very good to travel you learn so much more that way.



I had two brothers who travelled the world and never came home but settled in Thailand, they have both done very well for themselves.

Eeek meant to cheer you not scare you. Sorry :oops:

Re: Worrying!

Post by Kizzie » Sun Jun 03, 2018 7:16 am

Abs wrote:
Aww don't worry about me. I was talking to this one lady who thought I was suicidal, so she talked me into talking to some people who have gone through the same, she said it will help me and that person. It didn't go well. The first time she called all she did was sit and talk about her son and how I will lose all my friends like she did and how it will never stop hurting. How some days she can not get out of bed even though it's been 12 years. All she did was make me feel worse. It may have helped her to get to talk about it, but it didn't help me at all.


She sounds like my old support worker. spent the whole hour a week for 5 years talking about herself. Didn't do one thing to support me. I finally pucked up the courage to talk to my SW about her and she then deemed I was well enough to not need support anymore. Good job my sense of humour always stayed with me.

As with everything, One day at a time, one moment at a time. If I had done what I wanted to years back I would not be here now, the happiest or should I say, content-est time of my life, I would have missed so much.

:wubbers:

Re: Worrying!

Post by Lady Murasaki » Sat Jun 02, 2018 6:13 am

Bella wrote:
Lady Murasaki wrote:
Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Sounds exciting. You’ve obviously instilled an adventurous spirit in him. Well done! :Wiiiine!:


I'd like to think so, he has been Home educated since the age of 13 and seems far more confident than some of his (school educated) mates.
I'm proud, he does it all himself and has pretty bad dyscalculia and dyslexia... like his Mother :smilin: A good education to book flights and accommodation and visas etc
We had to learn the unschooling thing, but it has obviously worked. Plans for college on return and he can go back to his work place :smilin:

Meanwhile I will be nervous wreck until he meets us up in Portugal :bawlin:


Well he’s obviously become a confident young adult despite the difficult years. My youngest is similar, he loves travelling, and works so he can afford it, but all he got out of school was a decent group of friends who he still holidays with once a year. They’re camping in Wales next month.
I’d worry if he was halfway across the world without family too, but I get excited for them when they go. With whattasp and social media etc it’s easy to keep in touch nowadays, that lessens the worry for me.

Re: Worrying!

Post by Bella » Fri Jun 01, 2018 8:41 pm

Lady Murasaki wrote:
Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Sounds exciting. You’ve obviously instilled an adventurous spirit in him. Well done! :Wiiiine!:


I'd like to think so, he has been Home educated since the age of 13 and seems far more confident than some of his (school educated) mates.
I'm proud, he does it all himself and has pretty bad dyscalculia and dyslexia... like his Mother :smilin: A good education to book flights and accommodation and visas etc
We had to learn the unschooling thing, but it has obviously worked. Plans for college on return and he can go back to his work place :smilin:

Meanwhile I will be nervous wreck until he meets us up in Portugal :bawlin:

Re: Worrying!

Post by Lady Murasaki » Thu May 31, 2018 7:25 am

Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Sounds exciting. You’ve obviously instilled an adventurous spirit in him. Well done! :Wiiiine!:

Re: Worrying!

Post by Abs » Thu May 31, 2018 6:45 am

Gabby wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Hang in there, I can imagine how hard it must be to you.


I was thinking how much you enjoyed your poetry, do you still write any?

Also you were good at making games threads :smilin:


I haven't written in quite awhile cept the poems I wrote for my dad, and my son. Yeah I was still doing my games elsewhere but with all the stuff i've been through I just didn't feel like doing it anymore. Nothing interests me, nothing matters I just don't care. I just want to join my son.


Oh Abs, my heart breaks for you..... you must speak to others experiencing the same as you.... don’t face it alone, you’re not on your own, you could gain some comfort by doing so :wubbers:


Aww don't worry about me. I was talking to this one lady who thought I was suicidal, so she talked me into talking to some people who have gone through the same, she said it will help me and that person. It didn't go well. The first time she called all she did was sit and talk about her son and how I will lose all my friends like she did and how it will never stop hurting. How some days she can not get out of bed even though it's been 12 years. All she did was make me feel worse. It may have helped her to get to talk about it, but it didn't help me at all.

Re: Worrying!

Post by Keyser » Wed May 30, 2018 9:24 pm

Gabby wrote:
Oh Abs, my heart breaks for you..... you must speak to others experiencing the same as you.... don’t face it alone, you’re not on your own, you could gain some comfort by doing so :wubbers:


A beautiful post and seconded. :smilin:

Re: Worrying!

Post by Gabby » Wed May 30, 2018 8:22 am

Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Hang in there, I can imagine how hard it must be to you.


I was thinking how much you enjoyed your poetry, do you still write any?

Also you were good at making games threads :smilin:


I haven't written in quite awhile cept the poems I wrote for my dad, and my son. Yeah I was still doing my games elsewhere but with all the stuff i've been through I just didn't feel like doing it anymore. Nothing interests me, nothing matters I just don't care. I just want to join my son.


Oh Abs, my heart breaks for you..... you must speak to others experiencing the same as you.... don’t face it alone, you’re not on your own, you could gain some comfort by doing so :wubbers:

Re: Worrying!

Post by Abs » Wed May 30, 2018 2:06 am

Bella wrote:
Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Hang in there, I can imagine how hard it must be to you.


I was thinking how much you enjoyed your poetry, do you still write any?

Also you were good at making games threads :smilin:


I haven't written in quite awhile cept the poems I wrote for my dad, and my son. Yeah I was still doing my games elsewhere but with all the stuff i've been through I just didn't feel like doing it anymore. Nothing interests me, nothing matters I just don't care. I just want to join my son.

Re: Worrying!

Post by Bella » Tue May 29, 2018 11:25 pm

Abs wrote:
Bella wrote:
MG2 wrote:It must be a worry, Bella. Do you have an arrangement set where he messages you once a week at least or something.

Where is he off to?


Everyday I hope or I will melt.

He's 18, he's going to Japan (he's been there before alone) Japan is very safe and then on onto Vietnam and maybe Cambodia.

I'm sure he'll be fine and having fun whilst I am a nervous wreck :bawlin:


Hang in there, I can imagine how hard it must be to you.


I was thinking how much you enjoyed your poetry, do you still write any?

Also you were good at making games threads :smilin:

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