Useful tips!

A right load of bollocks...

Re: Useful tips!

Postby NastyNickers » Sun May 13, 2018 1:21 pm

Trapper John wrote:When driving at night, flash your headlights twice in quick succession and watch the car in front breaklights light up as they think they missed spotting a speed camera.


Someone was doing this last night on the motorway. Going down the middle lane and flashing every car in front until they moved out of the middle lane.

I hate middle lane hoggers, but the outside lane was about to turn into a slip road, and it’s so fucking distracting driving at night with some cunt constantly flashing and not being sure where the flashing is coming from.
User avatar
NastyNickers
 
Posts: 5152
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2017 2:06 am

Re: Useful tips!

Postby dis » Sun May 13, 2018 1:31 pm

measurer wrote:Use stale bread to remove grubby finger marks off of painted walls.
Newspaper really does make ur windows shine - use to buff them up.
Ladder in ur nylons? - use soap and dab at the end of the run - this will stop it going further.
Both pair of tights got a run in them? Then if same colour, cut one leg off each pair, and then use them by putting both one legged tights on each leg - voila a new pair.


That made me laugh for some reason, but confused me too. Do you keep the bum bit on each leg?
User avatar
dis
 
Posts: 1874
Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 11:29 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby measurer » Sun May 13, 2018 4:02 pm

dis wrote:
measurer wrote:Use stale bread to remove grubby finger marks off of painted walls.
Newspaper really does make ur windows shine - use to buff them up.
Ladder in ur nylons? - use soap and dab at the end of the run - this will stop it going further.
Both pair of tights got a run in them? Then if same colour, cut one leg off each pair, and then use them by putting both one legged tights on each leg - voila a new pair.


That made me laugh for some reason, but confused me too. Do you keep the bum bit on each leg?




That made me laugh for some reason, but confused me too. Do you keep the bum bit on each leg?[/quote]

Keep the tops. Just means ur putting on two pairs but with one leg on each. ( Extra elastane will also hold the belly if you have one ).
User avatar
measurer
Site Admin
 
Posts: 10280
Joined: Sun Jul 11, 2010 2:51 pm
Location: Taking care of business...

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Junglejayne » Sun May 13, 2018 4:56 pm

Annoy and frustrate Specsavers Staff by wandering upto their counter, squinting your eyes while looking at their notice board and when they ask can they help you answer "Big Mac Meal please". :gigglesnshit:
User avatar
Junglejayne
 
Posts: 2633
Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2015 4:53 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby dis » Sun May 13, 2018 5:16 pm

Junglejayne wrote:Annoy and frustrate Specsavers Staff by wandering upto their counter, squinting your eyes while looking at their notice board and when they ask can they help you answer "Big Mac Meal please". :gigglesnshit:


:mrgreen:
User avatar
dis
 
Posts: 1874
Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 11:29 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Keyser » Sun May 13, 2018 5:29 pm

Leprechauns.

Protect your finances by investing in a tracker fund rather than relying on an ailing currency and leaving a 300 foot technicolour arrow in the sky pointing towards where you have hidden it.
User avatar
Keyser
 
Posts: 11117
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2015 7:25 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Nucks » Sun May 13, 2018 5:33 pm

Image

:gigglesnshit:

It’s not a bad tip really, I certainly wouldn’t go looking in what I thought was a dirty nappy lying in the sand. :pukeup:
User avatar
Nucks
 
Posts: 4621
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 9:59 am

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Nucks » Sun May 13, 2018 5:36 pm

Image

:gigglesnshit:
User avatar
Nucks
 
Posts: 4621
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 9:59 am

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Junglejayne » Sun May 13, 2018 5:39 pm

Image
User avatar
Junglejayne
 
Posts: 2633
Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2015 4:53 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby dis » Sun May 13, 2018 5:42 pm

Junglejayne wrote:Image



What would happen there is I would be found cut in half with my trousers round my ankles. :bawlin:
User avatar
dis
 
Posts: 1874
Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 11:29 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Junglejayne » Sun May 13, 2018 5:44 pm

dis wrote:

What would happen there is I would be found cut in half with my trousers round my ankles. :bawlin:


And your head down the toilet :mrgreen:
User avatar
Junglejayne
 
Posts: 2633
Joined: Wed Jul 15, 2015 4:53 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby dis » Sun May 13, 2018 5:46 pm

Junglejayne wrote:
dis wrote:

What would happen there is I would be found cut in half with my trousers round my ankles. :bawlin:


And your head down the toilet :mrgreen:


Aye with a grimace on my face.
User avatar
dis
 
Posts: 1874
Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 11:29 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Keyser » Sun May 13, 2018 5:54 pm

Image
User avatar
Keyser
 
Posts: 11117
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2015 7:25 pm

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Daisymay » Sun May 13, 2018 5:56 pm

Nucks wrote:Image

:gigglesnshit:

It’s not a bad tip really, I certainly wouldn’t go looking in what I thought was a dirty nappy lying in the sand. :pukeup:


Nah Nucks knowing my luck there'd be a beach clean going by as my back was turned ,and before I knew it .Whoosh it would have been swooped up in a Bag with all the other rubbish and away eyebrow
User avatar
Daisymay
 
Posts: 64
Joined: Fri Apr 06, 2018 11:56 am

Re: Useful tips!

Postby Keyser » Sun May 13, 2018 7:44 pm

Image
User avatar
Keyser
 
Posts: 11117
Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2015 7:25 pm

PreviousNext

Return to The Sleeping Dogs' Arms

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot] and 12 guests