Random Stuff # 26

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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Cobs » Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:25 pm

Dean wrote:Sad news from the Nestlé factory today. A night shift worker was crushed beneath a case of chocolate that fell 20 feet off the storage racking. He called for help repeatedly but every time he shouted "The Milky Bars are on me" his colleagues just cheered. :shake head:

Nonce
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Cleopatra » Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:30 pm

Dean wrote:Sad news from the Nestlé factory today. A night shift worker was crushed beneath a case of chocolate that fell 20 feet off the storage racking. He called for help repeatedly but every time he shouted "The Milky Bars are on me" his colleagues just cheered. :shake head:


:pmsl:

Two drunk mates left the pub. One had a gammy leg and the other had a hump on his back. They said goodbye and the one with the hump walked through the graveyard and the one with the bad leg took the road. The next night they met up again at the pub. Hump man was standing up as straight as a rod with no sign of his hump on his back. "What happened to your hump?", said bad leg guy. His friend told him the story of a strange, ghostly figure in the graveyard who appeared from behind a stone, touched his hump and it disappeared. Bad leg man was astounded. "Do you think if I did the same, it would happen for me, too?", he said. They left the pub and bad leg man made his way through the graveyard. Halfway through, a ghostly figure appeared from behind a stone and said, "Here, have a hump".
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Dean » Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:46 pm

Cobs wrote:
Dean wrote:Sad news from the Nestlé factory today. A night shift worker was crushed beneath a case of chocolate that fell 20 feet off the storage racking. He called for help repeatedly but every time he shouted "The Milky Bars are on me" his colleagues just cheered. :shake head:

Nonce


Edgy... :again?:
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Cobs » Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:05 pm

Image
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby NastyNickers » Sat Jan 12, 2019 10:58 am

The systems are down at work and I have never been more bored in my life.
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Lady Murasaki » Sat Jan 12, 2019 1:47 pm

NastyNickers wrote:The systems are down at work and I have never been more bored in my life.


I’m staying in today, having a great time so far. Exercising interspersed with fun posting and meditating.
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Cobs » Sat Jan 12, 2019 1:59 pm

I have more posts on dogs than ds. :ooer:
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Lady Murasaki » Sat Jan 12, 2019 2:20 pm

Cobs wrote:I have more posts on dogs than ds. :ooer:


Who are you anyway?
Weirdo.
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Dean » Sat Jan 12, 2019 2:35 pm

Lady Murasaki wrote:
Cobs wrote:I have more posts on dogs than ds. :ooer:


Who are you anyway?
Weirdo.


Why is he a weirdo?
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Guest » Sat Jan 12, 2019 2:52 pm

Cobs wrote:I have more posts on dogs than ds. :ooer:



Love DS, there's always something going on, and certain folk to "catch up with" :wink:
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby BUDGIE » Sat Jan 12, 2019 3:19 pm

Dean wrote:Sad news from the Nestlé factory today. A night shift worker was crushed beneath a case of chocolate that fell 20 feet off the storage racking. He called for help repeatedly but every time he shouted "The Milky Bars are on me" his colleagues just cheered. :shake head:


I heard that joke on a Bernard Manning video from :pmsl: :pmsl: :pmsl:

If I can find the link, I'll post it....
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby Dean » Sat Jan 12, 2019 3:22 pm

BUDGIE wrote:
Dean wrote:Sad news from the Nestlé factory today. A night shift worker was crushed beneath a case of chocolate that fell 20 feet off the storage racking. He called for help repeatedly but every time he shouted "The Milky Bars are on me" his colleagues just cheered. :shake head:


I heard that joke on a Bernard Manning video from :pmsl: :pmsl: :pmsl:

If I can find the link, I'll post it....


I was just trying to lighten the mood a little. Too much trolling...
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby BUDGIE » Sat Jan 12, 2019 3:33 pm

I know loads of jokes, unfortunately they're all dirty jokes and up here in Scotlandistan under Krankie, would probably get me arrested.....

Anyway here's some that are not going to get me lifted, taken off Scottish Police twitter no less.....


Did you hear about the gay electrician?? He wired into his pal

Did you hear about the gay roofer?? He enjoyed getting felt on the roof.

Did you hear about the gay Australian sailor?? He steamed into Sydney.

Did you hear about the under performing human cannonball?? He got fired

Why do Germans hate golf? They can't get out the bunkers....
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby xtras1 » Sat Jan 12, 2019 3:41 pm

BUDGIE wrote:I know loads of jokes, unfortunately they're all dirty jokes and up here in Scotlandistan under Krankie, would probably get me arrested.....

Anyway here's some that are not going to get me lifted, taken off Scottish Police twitter no less.....


Did you hear about the gay electrician?? He wired into his pal

Did you hear about the gay roofer?? He enjoyed getting felt on the roof.

Did you hear about the gay Australian sailor?? He steamed into Sydney.

Did you hear about the under performing human cannonball?? He got fired

Why do Germans hate golf? They can't get out the bunkers....



But they are not funny :ooer:

:again?:

:gigglesnshit:
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Re: Random Stuff # 26

Postby BUDGIE » Sat Jan 12, 2019 3:44 pm

xtras1 wrote:
BUDGIE wrote:I know loads of jokes, unfortunately they're all dirty jokes and up here in Scotlandistan under Krankie, would probably get me arrested.....

Anyway here's some that are not going to get me lifted, taken off Scottish Police twitter no less.....


Did you hear about the gay electrician?? He wired into his pal

Did you hear about the gay roofer?? He enjoyed getting felt on the roof.

Did you hear about the gay Australian sailor?? He steamed into Sydney.

Did you hear about the under performing human cannonball?? He got fired

Why do Germans hate golf? They can't get out the bunkers....



But they are not funny :ooer:

:again?:

:gigglesnshit:


I agree, they weren't funny, you can blame the snowflake generation for that......
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