Ballymena is a shit hole, that's why Edna is there

[I can't escape Ballymena, and I'm so fat]

Ballymena
This really is the crowning shit hole of N.Ireland.

It's got bigotted, sectarian, racist, ignorant residents who don't speak to outsiders and complain that there is nowhere to go for a night out other than the local pub. The reason for this is simply that the last night club that opened in the town was overun with paramilitary groups within 3 weeks, who then put their own members on the doors as bouncers. It was finally closed when several punters were stabbed after a local paramilitary feud, one guy having his eye stabbed out.

Many are delusional too, being told by a local that I couldn't be as good a sound engineer as he, since y'know he was working in a bus fitters yard and I was working as a sound engineer, and had been for a few years.

I have seen locals being ignored simply because they left to live somewhere else or simply because they got an education. One evening in particular springs to mind when my mate went over to a group of her old friends after coming back from university they respoded with "what do you want?" and "your the one who decided to leave" etc it seemed that they were annoyed that she didn't want to work in the local chip shop for the rest of her life (which, i hear, they are still doing 6 years on)

The local council is funny as hell though, apparently the town has a huge heroin problem and they seem to think it's caused by shops being open on a sunday as far as I can tell. You can usually find the hardcore religious types standing in the centre of town preaching to people who just ignore them. The authorities just ignore the problem completely along with other more serious allegations againt the town's more 'respectable' residents.

The council once banned ELO playing at their local football grounds on the basis that they were promoting satanism amongst the towns vulnerable youth! Many of whom are to preoccupied with buying wkd from the local off license.

The town does have some lovely people in it but it appears that if you live there long enough you become an embittered, jealous, resentful person, who gets angry at everyone else who worked hard to get somwhere, just because they were not handed everything on a plate.

Oh and I would walk through the darkest, deepest parts of Stoke, Essex or fucking Glasgow before I would walk anywhere through that town at night...it's fucking deadly. http://www.b3ta.com/questions/rubbishtowns/page9/

[Marry me and take me to Mother England, Dave!]

Scary, isn't it, that most Norn Iron towns and villages function along these lines, yet Ballymena seems to have some kind of concentrated bitterness to it. I think there may only be one thing worse than a small town in Norn Iron and that's a small town Norn Iron that's run by Free Ps

Oh lordy yes, I forgot about the presbyterian and paisley thing

In its meagre defence, it has got a big shappin' centre, hi.

I was born and reared there. I spent the first 18 years of my life in that place, in a lovely little housing estate called Dunclug. I still have the scars on my knuckles to prove it :-( . The protestant / catholic thing was rife, the weekends entertainment seemed to be meeting up in some of the local parks and trying to kill someone else from another school. The heroin problem was just starting to rear it's head when we left, a few old schoolmates have since died from OD's and more have picked up all sorts of nasties from needles as well.

The council I remember well, the trial Sunday openings and the subsequent picketing of the businesses that tried to open by Paisley's cronies, stood outside preaching fire and brimstone tainted hate outside their doors. Also the whole of the the main shopping street, church street was owned by them as well, working for them was a nightmare, unless you were in the 'clique' and in the habit of going to church 3-4 times a week you were going nowhere, I can safely say I have never met a more vicious, nasty, vindictive set of people than those good living 'Christians' in my whole life.

I've moved out of there 15 years now and I've never set foot in the place since. Hateful, hateful, nasty little narrow-minded place. I've since moved to Belfast and I can safely say that it's been a move up in the world. http://www.b3ta.com/questions/rubbishtowns/post555424

[They don't make Union Jack pants in size XXXXXXXXXXXXXXL!!!]

Stooo can you put this with your announcements about Edders pls?

As I predicted some months ago when this nonsensical stunt was first mooted - these parades will never happen (there may be one in Ballymena, but frankly, who gives a fuck? The place is a complete shit-hole and the type of twat likely to show up to cheer on ‘Ulster’s’ finest simply deserves to live there). Slowly but surely the ‘British as Finchley’ brigade are getting their come-uppance. The British had major trouble organising home-coming parades in Britain - how the hell they ever thought they were going to organise them in the North is just beyond me. If there is a parade in Belfast then everyone knows it will be an utter circus - republicans and anti-war protesters will come out in vast numbers and swathes of less radicalised but equally political punters (myself included) will simply stay at home. The only ‘support’ likely to turn out would be the usual human sewage one sees drunk to kingdom come wearing Union Jack underpants and ‘fuck the pope’ t-shirts on the twelfth. Somehow I think brave, modest self-effacing soldiers would rather sit-in with a beer and a nice meal than be cheered on by those types of oxygen thiefs….

[Guest]

http://www.sluggerotoole.com/index.php/ ... -take-off/

[Stooo]

Stooo can you put this with your announcements about Edders pls?

As I predicted some months ago when this nonsensical stunt was first mooted - these parades will never happen (there may be one in Ballymena, but frankly, who gives a fuck? The place is a complete shit-hole and the type of twat likely to show up to cheer on ‘Ulster’s’ finest simply deserves to live there). Slowly but surely the ‘British as Finchley’ brigade are getting their come-uppance. The British had major trouble organising home-coming parades in Britain - how the hell they ever thought they were going to organise them in the North is just beyond me. If there is a parade in Belfast then everyone knows it will be an utter circus - republicans and anti-war protesters will come out in vast numbers and swathes of less radicalised but equally political punters (myself included) will simply stay at home. The only ‘support’ likely to turn out would be the usual human sewage one sees drunk to kingdom come wearing Union Jack underpants and ‘fuck the pope’ t-shirts on the twelfth. Somehow I think brave, modest self-effacing soldiers would rather sit-in with a beer and a nice meal than be cheered on by those types of oxygen thiefs….

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

[Guest]

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

They can't afford the ferry! Edna has been writing about her hair. http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/sho ... l?t=777671
Hi

I have made a complete c*** up of my hair. I dyed it red, bleached it to get rid of it and it went orange...Then to hide the orange i put a medium brown and it is almost black in places. I am very pale and it looks awful. I need a hairdresser in Ballymena that can sort me out! Any tips on what can be done to my hair [no comments about doing a britney, thanks!] and where i can go, will be very much appreciated!

[Blimey]

I can see you really have some serious probs folks! LOL You will have to go all the way to West Virginia to find peeps like this LOL LO

[Canuck]

I can see you really have some serious probs folks! LOL You will have to go all the way to West Virginia to find peeps like this LOL LO

Are you saying that Trinity is one of those peeps with problems?

[Blimey]

Trini doesn´t live in West Virginia!

[Guest]

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

Mega mouth on the internet, cowardly cunt when not?
I'd be careful Stuart, more than a few people would happily give you a much deserved slap.

Oh, and I bravely posted this using a proxy.

[charlie]

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

Mega mouth on the internet, cowardly cunt when not?
I'd be careful Stuart, more than a few people would happily give you a much deserved slap.

Oh, and I bravely posted this using a proxy.

That's quite funny.


The last bit I mean.

[Guest]

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

Mega mouth on the internet, cowardly cunt when not?
I'd be careful Stuart, more than a few people would happily give you a much deserved slap.

Oh, and I bravely posted this using a proxy.

That's quite funny.


The last bit I mean.

Admin edits are such old news now. This forum supports guest posting does it not? I can and will use any proxy or IP of my own chosing thankyou.

[Claire]

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

Mega mouth on the internet, cowardly cunt when not?
I'd be careful Stuart, more than a few people would happily give you a much deserved slap.

Oh, and I bravely posted this using a proxy.

That's quite funny.


The last bit I mean.

Admin edits are such old news now. This forum supports guest posting does it not? I can and will use any proxy or IP of my own chosing thankyou.

Was that an admin edit? I thought it was someone who realised what a coward they were!

[Guest]

Good morning to you too proxy queen.

[Guest]

Thinking about it, I don't really want half a dozen of Ballymena's finest turning up on my doorstep after the fat one has given them a tip off.

Mega mouth on the internet, cowardly cunt when not?
I'd be careful Stuart, more than a few people would happily give you a much deserved slap.

Oh, and I bravely posted this using a proxy.

You can't do anything fatty, because you can't walk much without chafing your thighs and your fat-filled arteries give up trying. You can't depend on Dave because he's drunk most of the time.